www.byzcath.org Forums Faith & Christian Life Faith & Theology What is Marriage?

Deacon Richard:

When I think of what might be termed a "theological basis" for marriage, I'm thinking of what the Lord seemed (to me) to be pointing to when He referred to the way things were meant to be in the beginning. I'm thinking in terms of removing the culture-bound ideas of arranged marriages, no matter what the culture. I'm thinking in terms of mutuality in which St. Paul refers to each one deferring to the other. I'm thinking in terms of love--not that brutalized concept in our culture--but that deep compassion for the other such that each one thinks of the other's good as well as his own.

Maybe it's a result of my own conclusion that no culture has yet been fully evangelized such that some of the old mindsets have been completely purged.

I have to think of my mother-in-law--may she rest in peace--forced to marry a man 10 years her senior when she'd just finished elementary school at 15. She was a good soldier: she kept her head down and her mouth shut for over 64 years and was treated like an endentured servant for much of that time, waiting on her husband hand and foot. She let the mask slip often when she'd say she'd told her daughters to "join the convent and see the world and you won't have a man telling you what to do." That's why her eldest daughter is in a convent today: the father tried to force an arranged marriage on her right at the ripe old age of 16. One of my relatives was in my mother-in-law's class in school and she often said the only thing she remembered from school was how evil arranged marriages are.

The there's the abuse I've witnessed in marriages where the husband thought he had a God-given right to beat a woman when she ran afoul of his whims, wishes, or commands. For me that's a lack of the leaven of the Gospel into the concept of marriage.

I also come from the angle that the Latin Church teaches when it is said that the primary purpose of marriage is the mutual sanctification of the spouses. We've here to walk together toward the Kindgom and everything else is secondary to our growth together in Christ.

BOB

(Out for a bit, just read all the comments up to this point.)

Fair question, I was reading St. Basil's canons today (http://www.newadvent.org/fathers/3202199.htm). From his definition of fornication and treatment of cohabitation, I believe that some principles might be gleaned that might answer the questions I raised at the beginning of this thread. According to my reading of St. Basil's canons, premarital fornication occurs when two persons have sexual relations or cohabitate and at least one of the two are not independent or legally authorized to enter into a marital covenant. Here are the relevant canons, please read them carefully and share your thoughts:



You're welcome. I appreciate the support.

Forgive my ambiguity. I will state my purpose in the clearest manner I can. I am sifting through dogmatic sources for answers to the following two questions:

1) If two persons are married to each other, what does that mean in the most general sense?

2) Does *revelation* provide a explicit/implicit answer to the question of *when* a marriage contract comes into being or is recognized as such by God? Or is this largely the product of malleable custom or church discipline?

Everything I have written in this thread has as its intent finding answers to these two questions.

Then this thread is going to be closed since this is really two separate topics. I strongly suggest that each question be addressed in its own thread. The combination of the two questions is leading to a lot of posts and the answers not forthcoming because of the intermixing of these two questions.

I thank all that have participated in this thread, and welcome the starting of new threads that deal with each question specifically.

In IC XC,
Father Anthony+
Administrator