It's just "NO" to Least Common Denominator Orthodoxy
And David, you wrote "I do not wish to list all of my bases for my opinion about their leadership and some of their communion, but I will say that historically the manner in which many of their clergy treated other Orthodox clergy during their years of non-canonical status was more often than not disrespectful to say the least."
When exactly was ROCOR non-canonical? Who exactly declared them non-canonical? Can you provide me with dates? When Archbishop Iakovos presided at the funeral of Metropolitan Anastassy, did he bury an uncanonical bishop?
Metropolitan Anastassy reposed in 1965. Later that year, ROCOR took under its care Holy Transfiguration Monastery (Brookline, MA) after the latter had broken communion from the Greek Orthodox Archdiocese of America. I believe that event precipitated the decades long break with the Church of Constantiople. (Later, of course, that group and ROCOR came to a bitter divide.)
Bishop, later Metropolitan Laurus (Skurla) was consecrated a bishop by the ROCOR in 1967. In February of 1972 his first cousin died. The cousin and his large family were and are members of my ACROD parish. Since 1939 that parish had, and has, antimensia of a canonical Orthodox Bishop under the omophorion of the Patriarch of Constantinople. My father was a Orthodox priest, ordained by his Orthodox bishop (himself consecrated at the Phanar by Bishops of the EP' s Synod) and was pastor of the church were the funeral occurred. The Bishop politely declined my father's invitation to preside at the funeral or even offer a prayer at the end, explaining tearfully that his Metropolitan expressly forbade him to on account of issues with the Ecumenical Patriarchate. This caused something of a "mini scandal" in our parish at the time. I was there and witnessed this.
From the early seventies until 2009 no ROCOR priest participated in our Sunday of Orthodoxy or any service in my church, or any other local OCA, ACROD or GOARCH church. (The UOC were "out of the loop" as well during much of that period.)
The Iveron Icon was brought to St. Michael's with a contingent of clergy from the ROCOR cathedral in Mayfield, PA and St. Tikhon's OC Monastery that year where all the local Orthodox clergy and parishes were represented, including by that time the local UOCUSA ( excepting for the GOC priest who broke off from ROCOR at the time of the reunion to found a schismatic parish in Owego,NY).
I have previously related the visible joy in the faces of the celebrants and attendees at that Akathist.
For after all, the Psalmist reminds us that it is good for brothers to dwell in unity. (Even when there are little family spats.)
I hope that addressed your question. I realize that my recitation does not line up with that of ROCOR during those difficult years, but it does (anecdotally at least) reflect the common view of the non ROCOR churches which more or less remained in communion with each other during those trying years.
I would hate to see a return to the past. If ROCOR' s stand is intended to protest potential Hellenization of non Hellenes in such a united American church, it would likely be well received by many of us. But...if it is intended to convey a desire that ROCOR' s unique and venerable practices should be the norm, it will be rejected.
It's leaders need to convey the former and express the position that the strongest unified Orthodox Church in the Americas would be one firmly united in doctrine and equally firmly committed to respect for the cultural diversity which often obscures our religious unity.