Prayers for you and your wife!
Do spend time talking this through and perhaps consider seeing a Christian counselor. Whatever you do - don't upset yourself or tear your heart out with recriminations. IF it turns out that you and she go your separate ways, that is not the end of the world and again, it would not be your fault.
Even with the best of intentions, one could be married a very long time and then realize that one could have, and should have, married someone else. I've been there - still am.