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Some time ago my spiritual father and I had a long conversation about the fear of God. He said he couldn't reconcile the idea of fear of God with a merciful, loving God. So I went home and did some reading, some study, and some praying and sent him this. Am I on the right track?

BOB
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The Fear of God: �I do not now fear God, but I love Him, and love casts fear out of doors.� St. ANTHONY

When we grew up, the approach to God that we learned was that of the �Divine Accountant,� One Who kept track of each and every deed and misdeed. We were taught to fear God and His punishments. This tendency stemmed from the ascetic tradition, but is an over-simplification of it and thus a distortion/caricature of it. The ascetic tradition, stemming from a desire to fully live the Gospel was concerned with finding the fear of God that was the beginning of wisdom. After all, �the fear of God is the beginning of wisdom�: Proverbs 9:10. The Fathers in the ascetic tradition saw the Divine Wisdom as being to the mind what grace is to the soul--a participation in the Divine life we were meant to have at our creation but which was side-tracked by Original Sin.
The Desert Fathers (The Sayings of the Fathers, translated by Pelagius the Deacon and John the Subdeacon, Book I [Of the Perfecting of the Fathers], xix) tell us that �If a man have humility and poverty and judge not another, so come in him the fear of God.� Book III (Of Compunction--the sharp stabs of guilt and remorse caused by sin), iv, quotes abbot Elias �Three things I fear: the first, what time my soul shall go forth from my body; the second, what time I shall go to meet God; the third, what time the sentence shall go forth against me.� Then in another collection, ascribed to �Martin, Abbot of Dumes,� xxii, �A brother asked an old man saying,

�My heart is hard, and does not fear God: what
shall I do, that I may fear God?� He made
answer, �I think myself that if a man would
for ever accuse himself in his heart, he
would come to the fear of God.� The brother
said, �What is it, to accuse one�s self?�
The old man answered, �That in every con-
juncture he should accuse his soul, saying
to it that he must stand before God . . .�

Wisdom in the patristic sense seems to be akin to grace in the soul, but that it applies to the mind: the Divine Wisdom unfolds itself through the Holy Spirit so that what appears alien or silly or pointless to those who will be lost is made clear to the one
meant to be saved; grace brings the virtues to life within the soul in a similar manner through cooperation with the Holy Spirit. What makes these quotes alien to us is that we approach them in isolation; they were meant to be understood as part of a unified wholeness that was part of their lived-out experience.
What appears to be contradiction comes in Book XVII (Of Love), i, �Said the abbot Anthony: �I do not now fear God, but I love Him, for love casts fear out of doors.� (This Anthony is the one credited with being the Father of monasticism--monasticism in itself was a reaction to �culture Catholics� or �political Catholics� in its earliest forms, emphasizing that there had to be a commitment to Jesus Christ on the part of the believer, that suffering was a normal part of being a Christ-follower [linked to His Passion and having an eternal value], that there was a value Catholics sought that was alien to this world even when it is acceptable to be a Catholic.)
These quotes seemed to me to be contradictory and strange when I first read them in the late 1960s. What I didn�t understand was how these all fit together as a seamless whole wrapped in humility and love. But prayer and the grace of God opened them in bits as study took me toward God. My spiritual director told me to keep reading this collection over and over and that eventually it would begin to make sense--much like the collections of sayings that Catholics used to use before Vatican II to gain insight on the virtues and other aspects of spiritual living.
Like a child, our first approach to God is like our approach to school--lots of rules, backed up by punishment, fear, going through the motions without knowing why; being trained. Well, that�s not all bad. It�s not enough, but it�s not all bad. Like a child, we�ve all got to start somewhere, even with learning about God. And in anything that we start to learn, there�s got to be the discipline of the subject to form the outlines so that progress may be measured and errors corrected. God is omnipotent, omniscient, all wise; He�s everywhere and fills everything; no one can get away from Him even in the most secret place. So the idea of the fear of God helps to reinforce the ideas of His Being other than us and our being accountable to Him for our conduct. (On the other hand, once we get the idea of His Being everywhere, we can be confident in His Providence for us everywhere and in the most difficult situations.)
Unfortunately, that�s as far as many get with their relationship with God. That arms�-length thing. They know about God, but they don�t know Him.
In older English meanings, �know� signifies
the intimate marital relationship between a
man and a woman that includes the marital act;
an intimacy so sacred that we used the veiled
term �know.�
I�ve come to see that that intimate, sacred relationship was used by the Fathers to signify the deep, exclusive, personal, permanent relationship* that God intended for each of us before Original Sin--that�s where all of the Bridegroom/Bride language comes from in the Scriptures (forgive me, I�m slow; that always made me squirm before the full impact of the meaning intended by the authors became clear because I thought it was misplaced).
As the Fathers saw it, one grows in his relationship with God and must necessarily grow in the way he approaches His commandments. The commandments are not revoked; there is still a penalty for disobedience; but one grows from the fear of God to such a love of Him--to such a depth and height and breadth of relationship with Him--that one obeys His commandments out of that love. Our communion/coming into union moves us to the point that doing otherwise is so alien to who the believer has grown into that it is no longer something that one can do, without a deep sense of having broken a relationship that has become so basic that one wants to rush to make amends--because of love, not out of fear. Like the Byzantine bishop�s dikiri, God and the believer have come into a union of two flames that, while separate, burn together as a single flame; the sources can still be seen as separate but the light is one at its brightest point: this is the source of �at-one-ment�--original meaning of atonement, not just making up for sin but re-establishing relationship.
For those who have not taken the time to ask for the gift of faith or who have not made time for the relationship, the fear of God is not an altogether unhealthy posture. The Scripture is full of warnings of dire things to come when the Lord appears in His glory. So that�s not repealed.
It�s a matter of all these things being true at the same time and understanding how to integrate them into a unified wholeness (old English shows that wholeness and holiness have the same root, too). The process seems contradictory when one tries to understand portions in isolation and then comparing them to new things learned, especially when it�s done without the help of prayer, good spiritual direction from someone experienced in the spiritual life, the sacraments, grace, etc.
I�ve been down this path. I started with memorizing all the answers and the questions. I learned the prayers by heart. I learned the motions. Somewhere along the line I asked for faith, to be kept close to the Lord, and now am asking to hear �well done, good and faithful servant.� In that long process from �knowing about� to �knowing,� I have grown to understand some small part of the wisdom of no longer fearing, but learning trust and the meaning of �being faithful� that includes the leap of faith that puts everything in His Hands. Therein lies the peace from above promised by Jesus (�not as the world gives�).
So it�s not so much a balance between fear of God and no fear at all, as it is a progression in growth in relationship. And unfortunately for those who have tried to get rid of guilt, sin, and the struggle with relationship, there aren�t any shortcuts either. You don�t land close to God overnight. You don�t land at a love of God without first fearing Him--otherwise we�d be in a relationship with Someone we couldn�t respect; a pushover we could get away with anything with or negotiate with over sin. Worse, we might be in love with a god of our own making who couldn�t help us over the rough spots in life. In fact, the closer one comes to God the more unsure he is that he even has made a single step in the right direction.
Book XI, ii: The abbot Agatho in the day of
his dying said �I stand in sight of the divine
Judgment. Here I have toiled with what strength
I had to keep the commandments of God: but I
am a man, and I know not whether my works have
been pleasing in His sight. I do not presume
(to be confident of my own status with Him), until
I have come before God: for the judgments of God
are other than the judgments of men.�

Book XX, v: Abbot Sisois said (to those brothers
around him when he was on his deathbed) �Verily I
know not if I have clutched at the very beginning
of repentance.� (Also implying holy living)

*Relationship defined in other places as �communion�/�coming into union� wherein we are in process/growth as we will continue to be for all eternity (cf St. Gregory of Nyssa, From Glory to Glory). Communion takes four avenues for the Fathers, not all equal in value. Holy Communion, the participation in the Body and Blood of Christ Himself--primary and without equal; Scripture reading, the experience of Christ speaking to us through our reading, study, and prayerful reflection; prayer, conversation with the Lord that leads to wordless contemplation--a gift given at God�s own good pleasure to those who are faithful; random acts of kindness/acts of charity=love=loving kindness=caritas
/almsgiving (synonyms)--not only money was meant in almsgiving, but giving of oneself as well as one�s treasure as an act of faith, faith being put into practice as St. James� Epistle admonishes us.

So the Fathers of the Desert pointed us in the right direction. The fear of the Lord is the beginning of wisdom. We grow in our communion with Him. By growing in our communion with Him, we come to leave the fear part out because it is filled with love.
And I think there is another subtle nuance here: the fear of God is refined from fear of punishment by God to fear of being separated from God, either here or for eternity.

Off the top and half asleep...

Fear of the Lord as it is a virtue is indeed humility and prudence working side by side.

Humility and prudence yields a metamorphosis into charity when the fear ceases to be a shying away from disobediences or their temporal consequences in order to avoid feeling the pain of sin, and is thus transfigured into deep compunction and an habitual shying away from doing the slightest thing to cause our Lord to grieve for us in any way.

Divine Wisdom reaches us first in the "heart" as with all infused virtue. The mind is always the tertiary receptor.

That's all I can think of at the moment. I guess you could tighten your thinking up a bit here in general, but you seem to be on the right track to me.

Eli

Dear Eli,

Your approval and/or disapproval of posts makes me think that perhaps you might be a priest or professor?!?

God bless,
Alice '

Dear Bob,

My priest has discussed this with our Orthodox fellowship/Bible Study group, and his take on it is that the word 'fear' is basically a combination of 'awe' and 'respect'.

In other words, think of it this way: If we were to see God in His majesty right now, we would probably fall down to our knees trembling with awe before His Greatness and Holiness.

In the old days, when children actually respected authority, think of how a child usually approached his own Father when he was called to him..it was a combination of awe, respect, fear, humility, trust and love all mixed together.

I don't know if these are good analogies, but they are the best I can think of right now.

Just my humble two cents.

I think that we are on the same page. What do you think?

In Christ our Lord,
Alice

He asked for comments, Alice. NOBODY has to pay any attention to me whatsoever. I hold no gun to anyone's head.

I have a favor to ask. Please do not treat my efforts to contribute substantively to this forum as thought it is no more than crass arrogance. That is a false attribution and I try to absorb as much of it as I can, but coming from a moderator I find it out of place.

If Bob had not asked I would not have made the observation and suggestion that I did.

Eli is getting tired of being chastised for expressing opinions just as many do here.

Eli

Eli,

Are you a priest or professor?

CDL

Dear Bob,

Now that the doubt has been raised in people's minds, I want to tell you publicly that I meant no offense at all to you. You and I have been speaking privately and I thought based upon those conversations that I would not have to pepper my note to you with little emoticons and sidebars to let everybody know that I mean you no harm in what I said.

Your work can be exceptionally tight and clean. Elegant is the word used to describe such writing. This last one here is not as elegant as others so I simply said that this one needs a little tightening in concepts, relationship of ideas and transitions. I don't think that is going to bother you at all. In fact I think it will cause you to go back and think it all through again. I expect the results will be another very good insight. Why would I not encourage you? I lke what you do.

Why would it be out of place to encourage a fellow spiritual thinker and writer to be the best they can be when you know how good that is?

Eli

Eli:

No offense taken. This was my take-off on a long conversation we had had and my spiritual father actually took it very well, saved it, and says he goes back to it.

Probably does need a little tightening. This was just a quick, off-the-top-of my head offering while the previous conversation was still fresh in my head. I haven't gone back to it for some time and thought I might get some pointers from some of my brethren here to polish it up a bit.

BOB

Thanks. Alice offered a perspective that is actually also a pretty common one. I don't mind doing that with it but that seems to be, at first glance, an interpretation rather than a direct dealing iwth the translated word "fear".

Fear in this case I have always presumed means a 'shying away from something' a 'drawing back' a 'recoiling'. There's movement in the image it is meant to invoke.

Who wants to think of themselves as recoiling from God?

But then to go back to Alice's pastor's interpretation of "awestruck", is there not some element of drawing back when one is overcome by a wonder?

These ideas of stopping dead in one's tracks, recoiling, and avoidance all come into play, and are all encompassed in the virtues of humility and prudence. It is not prudent to keep walking down the track into the teeth of the train Does that make the train a bad thing? No. Just bigger and faster than I am

And that's the humility. We recoil from God when we realize that he knows ALL of us to the root of our hair follicles, and if that does not make us stop dead on the tracks, I don't know what will.

Eli

Eli:

"Awestruck" is an interesting look at this approach to our God. Makes me think of something I once told a Bible study group. (THose who know me know I love to talk and am rarely at a loss for words. Also don't like surprises--someone jumping out from behind a couch and yelling "surprise," "Happy Birthday," etc.)

We were on the words of Jesus and His statement that "eye hath not seen, nor hath ear heard, nor hath it entered into the hearts of man what things God has prepared for those who love Him." I made the statement that I was prepared to walk into Heaven and be speechless.

And one member said he wanted to be there to see that!!!

BOB

"It is a dreadful thing to meet the God of Hosts face to face."

Remember Moses on the Mountain....

"Dreadful" in its archaic meaning means "inspiring awe or reverence," not the current "inspiring great fear or anxiety; extremely distasteful or unpleasant."

Seems our forebearers wanted us to understand the idea that we should be awed and not frightened silly.

BOB

Igen, Magyar. Kesenem sepen.

"Dreadful" in its archaic meaning means "inspiring awe or reverence," not the current "inspiring great fear or anxiety; extremely distasteful or unpleasant."

Seems our forebearers wanted us to understand the idea that we should be awed and not frightened silly.

Language, over time, has a tendency to become limited in its meanings, losing some of its flexibility. That's why a living language coins new words and finds new ways of expressing itself.

One of my favorite religious art pieces was a simple picture I saw in the foyer of a Mennonite church. It's called "The Homecoming." It depicts any one of us, dressed in a white garment, standing on the clouds, with arms down at the sides, back to the viewer. It shows Jesus embracing this person and it looks as if Jesus had run to embrace this person--almost as if He needed just a slight bit more enthusiasm to have knocked the person over in this embrace. You can almost hear an out-of-breath Jesus saying "Well done, good and faithful servant . . ." This picture hit me hard--that's how I'd like it to be.

In Christ,

BOB

Now here I don't see that being frightened silly and awestruck are opposed to one another. If I get close enough to the edge of the falls at Niagra, you can sure bet that I am frightened silly, yet I love those old falls, and I have a natural affinity to water in all forms, and I never say no to an opportunity to go and visit them. So I know without a doubt that something I love with a good sort of passion, can still scare the bejeekers out of me.

Eli