www.byzcath.org Forums Faith & Christian Life Parish Life & Evangelization Byzantine isolation

I am a Midwesterner, and my town is less than a thousand people, mostly of Norwegian heritage, or Dutch, thus the main religions are Lutheran and Reformed.

My parish is thirty minutes away, and no longer has a full-time priest. The priest who is there speaks next to no English. The nearest parish with a full time priest is a two hour drive.

My Protestant relatives have plenty of resources to plug into, in order to help them grow. My sister has her Protestant Bible studies, prayer meetings, youth groups overflowing, etc. My parish is full of senile immigrants who care more about the restaurant business than their faith (no offense to those in that business!).

I know there have to be others out there who feel the horrible isolation I feel. I am trying to live my Eastern Christian faith in a culture that is Protestant. My spiritual father lives in a different part of the country, so I can call him. But, I have nothing at HOME to plug into to help me grow and learn. This is highly distressing for me, and I have been tempted to accept my sister's invitations to her charismatic events, but conscience says that is a betrayal of the ancient faith.

Unfortunately, it seems that thriving EO/EC communities are only to be found in large cities, and I live far away from anything with a population over 100,000.

I guess my question is, how do us folk who are stuck in the middle of nowhere find some place to plug into? How do we live our Eastern faith in communities that are bombarded by Western influence??

Although some might say the internet, I have often found that to even be less than profitable, and I want face-to-face fellowship with others who believe as I do, and are excited about it.

Anyone care to comment?

Sorry about your situation...check out the Lutherans...they have a nice service...also some (although not all) Episcopal Churches are very nice...spiritual, etc...

I don't envy you your isolation from other Byzantines. Even monks usually live in communities. There are several things I can think of that can help in addition to phone calls and the internet.

Make your home your chapel by hanging icons in every room. Cultivate a family altar, if you haven't already. Icons are a constant reminder of your connections with the hereafter. They are also not unlike an extended family. I am reminded of how prisoners who have had an icon card used it to keep focused on the hope that is their True Faith when held captive.

Your home can be blessed by you. There is a ritual available for blessing your own home in cases where it is difficult or impossible for a priest to do so. I found that very practical even though we have a priest here, because he has a day job, and our parish is fairly widespread.

You could host a Holy Supper during Christmas season, if that is part of your tradition. Invite your Protestant friends and neighbors to see what Byzantine Catholicism can be like by sharing the Supper with them. I gather the Supper does not have to be on Christmas Eve, but can occur from then to Epiphany, since I have read of its happening on other dates besides the Eve. That makes it easier to get guests of other faiths to come.

You might even want to cultivate traditional cooking if it's part of your ethnic roots- pieroghies, poppy seed rolls, nut rolls, for example. Maybe sell some at your church occasionally.

Make a pilgrimage annually to one of our monasteries, preferably a private retreat where you can experience the full cycle of services and receive some personal counseling as well. It will definitely recharge your spiritual batteries. The annual pilgrimages are fine, too, with lots of people and potential opportunities to network.

Regular prayer, fasting, and spiritual reading need to be part of your personal daily discipline. Books like "The Way of the Pilgrim" will likely speak to your isolation especially and touch your heart in a positive way.

I find community worship VERY necessary, so make whatever arrangements you can without stepping away from your faith, and connect to your parish, although distant, in ways that will touch the congregation after they head back home. Look also for ways they can do the same for you, such as asking them to remember you in their prayers.

I will pray for you myself.

Glory to Jesus Christ! Glory to him forever!

I feel your pain, I live in Southern Indiana, land of the Evangelical whooping christian. I feel my heart sink, every week when I look at the over flowing parking lot of the "Mall Church" that resides a few blocks away... Sometimes I wish that my church was teeming with the faithful.. ALas...

Forgive me for being anecdotle but, here is my situation and maybe it will help you... My DH and I are Byzantine Catholic. The closest church for us is 50 miles away. My DH is a grad student and I'm an administrative assistant. Between us we have two cars that don't work very well. We attend an Orthodox Church every other week and attend Roman Catholic Church on the alternating weeks. When we are feeling rich and the weather isn't to bad we make the trek to the Byzantine Catholic church. It is not quite like the spiritual home we used to have but, we make the best of our situation. We have put together a wonderful icon corner and we have begun saying evening prayers together. I have been cooking out of an old ethnic cookbook. I am also thinking about putting together a group of other Lost Byzantine Catholics.

Keep up your private prayer it keeps our spiritual batteries recharged. Try to make connections with others in your community, chances are there might be someone who is in your shoes too!

I will keep you in my prayers.

Alison

Dear ODM,

My family too, understands what you are experience. In fact, 95% of our parish lives a half hour away or more. Several families come from as far as 75 minutes, and one family comes every weekend 2.5 hours away, one way. But out here in the "diaspora" one must do what one has to do, and what is within his abiltiy. It is most important is to live your life as a child of the East, and not to lose your indentity to the prevalent culture. This is difficult, i know, as we live in a fundementalist (actually, i wish it were that religious) area. We are fortunate to have a Greek church nearby (half an hour away, but still close by MO standards), where we can go if we can't make it to our own church. You ought to seek out pockets of the East where you are. You would be suprised where you could find them.

Dear Orthodox Dutchman:
Wow, I thought I was the only one to feel isolated. I don't think I'm even as isolated as you. We have just the one Ruthenian BC church in the state. Like others that posted, our parishoners also all live scattered about, some coming 45 minutes to over an hour away.

During the week I see nor speak to any one else who is Byzantine. My husband doesn't attend church, although he insists the kids attend :rolleyes: church.

My background isn't even Eastern, I grew up Roman so my extended family doesn't quite get the attraction for the East.

I keep my orthodox books handy and read daily. I have an icon in every room, including an icon of the Last Supper in the dining room! Jesus and the Theotokos overlook the kitchen sink/window.
And a little icon corner helps too.

I try to look at it this way: our crowns will be all the more glorious for having persisted despite being alone or isolated. We have to make more effort, not having everything we'd like so handy and convenient. We have to run a more difficult race.......

God Bless!
denise

For many years, I was far away from any other Byzantine, and long periods of time passed when I could not experience the Divine Liturgy, or hear the songs, or venerate the icons. I remember that very much, and it was painful.

It was important to me to remember that every time I prayed, in my heart, I was intimately close and united not only to God, but to every human being. I was a member of every community, and with every isolated person. I used to pray for those in "isolation" or "solitary confinement", prisoners and hostages.

I used to like to read the lives of the Saints, and in particular the great monastic fathers and mothers, like the story of Mary of Egypt, and the hermits of old, who endured and struggled alone in caves, hidden and cut off from the comfort and support of men. They had only God as their comfort and support. He never failed them. And of course, they were not poor for their isolation and poverty, they were the richest of men, and the greatest of Christians, they were the authentic Orthodox and Byzantine Christians.

God derprives every one of his servants of something. He takes away some support, some comfort, something on which we would otherwise choose to rely upon. Why? To remind us something painful and sweet.

He is a jealous God, and he will chasten and deprive us of something we treasure, in order to teach us that he wants us to rely on him alone. He only will never fail us, and everything else is of him. But he will be disappointed if we focus on his gifts, and neglect the giver. These little deprivations remind us of his jealous love.

But how sweet that is! To think that God cares so much about us, is so earnest to have us think of him, that he is willing to instruct us so lovingly.

Whenever we come to experience isolation (or loss, or pain), it might be God's gift. It might be God calling us to know him, rely on him, love him more deeply and directly.

If Orthodoxy is inside us, it needn't be always recognized in expected ways. Perhaps "face to face" regular support is not part of our experience for a time, then God will offer a unique gift, directly and without any intermediary. What a great calling, in our Church!

With prayerful support, and best wishes! I will place a particle on the holy diskos, next time I have the joy to celebrate.

To Dutchie and All,

May Our Holy and Mighty God Bless all His pilgrims!

In truth we pray together.

I will remember you in my prayers.

Michael, sinner

Dear Dutchman, we may feel isolated, but when I do (we are 1 1/2 hours from our nearest parishes) I think of our priests and faithful who were exiled or sent to the gulags in Siberia, Kazakhstan, etc. That is isolation, physical and spiritual.

At least we can keep our spiritual life and tradition through our prayer life.

Here is a web site that allows one access to the order of Reader's Services that can be used without a priest: http://pages.prodigy.net/frjohnwhiteford/horologion.htm

One can still keep the Byzantine tradition in the peace of your own "kellia" or cell in your house in front of your bright corner. You can cense with a hand censer, use candles, oil lamps, etc. The home really is a "domestic church". Although we hate to miss Liturgy, if someone is sick, etc. my family loves doing the Reader's services at home. May God bless you and all who dwell in the "desert".

Dear Heirmonk Elias
Thank you for your words. You said so much better what I was trying to say to Orthodox Dutchman.

I will remember your words as I go through my day.
denise

Dear Brother:

I don't think I could add much to what the others have said. But I think all of us understand what you are going through. I most certainly do! Isolation from my community of Faith is the order of the day for me and it has been very hard and I have went through many nights of tears because I missed the Divine Services of our Church and the Grace that comes from them. In a sense I think it is a form of martyrdom; a sharing in the Cross.
When you are away from your Byzantine Community lots of thoughts go through your head and many temptations to be disloyal come almost effortlessly to you.

I confess I have been lured away many times to the Roman Church or other Churches, but they NEVER will fill my soul like our Rusyn Church. I will never forget my Baptism with the tears and the weeping; I will never forget Forgiveness Vespers with the deep penitence and more tears and seeing Father Steve prostrate before us and ask forgivenss as we cringed and wanted to pull that holy man off the floor, and the great emmense joy of Holy Pascha and the many other services of our great Church. I will never forget the feeling of being changed forever - of never going back to my old life and the old ways. Even though I have no Byzantine Church here I must always pray before the Ikon Corner and weep and fall before the Pantokrator's Majesty. I believe Christ will give Byzantines a mitre in heaven for being faithful to their Church; for that I am sure.

Your brother in Christ!

Robert Horvath

Thank you to Hieromonk Elias. Your comments are excellent food for thought for all of us.

:p

I think this Forum "community" fills a gap for many of us who want to talk about our Faith and have few to discuss it with.

:p

May we help one other grow closer to Our Lord.

Thanks for the thoughtful responses and the wonderful advice. Much appreciated!

Well,

This place can never take the place of the Byzantine Forum..... And I Don't know if this is ok to do or not, if it isn't it will get removed and that is ok too.

http://www.churchbulletin.com is a small catholic chat room. The people in there are very friendly and devout in their faith and love to help others. It has both text and voice chat, and you don't get the nonsence that are in other chat rooms(although I have never been in antohter chat room) this place is very orthodox in their actions and understanding, the webmaster does an excellent. It is usually busier in the evenings and night than the day. But if you are rather far away from people then it is a great place to come and talk about your faith where you get an instant responce to your thoughts. They have challanged me and helped me to some lively discussions.

this is my first post here. I am a three hour drive from the nearest parish and I really feel that isolation, but there are ways to get around it. I like to read spiritual texts and learn about the faith, and learn in places like this forum that help ease the isolation.